a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
I was singing Colors of the Wind and swigging vodka and still felt like more of an adult.
I don’t care if there’s a pandemic. My husband gave me a hall pass for my 40th birthday and I’m going to use it!
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