Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
