what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Dude, this is like the 4th time today I've had to use cruise control for a 25mph zone. This hangover is never fucking gonna end.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
I'm the one who said we should take things slow. I'm also the one who forced him into the back on my car so we could have sex.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Randomize
