it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I was just like oh sorry I'm peeling meanwhile my legs are on either side of his head and I look like a fucking Komodo dragon
Do you think the firemen will remember me?
Yes. But you were sloppy, sobbing, and puked on two of them. You won't get in their pants.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Is it too soon for me to wonder what sex with him would be like?
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
Randomize
