can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I know I'm her Sunday school teacher. I just feel I would be saving others from a lot of headaches by telling her someday she's going to be a stripper
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
Randomize