Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Let the clothes fall where they may.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
Randomize
