bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
We got banned from that Whataburger for life. WHATABURGER. Which is saying something. They deal with drunk dumbasses every night.
Tequila happens.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Talked to the dude for a hour . I now know where he lives, his occupation, his goals, his dreams and what his dick looks like.
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize