five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
I FOUND THE LEGS
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize
