I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
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Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
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he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
Next time, dont ever let me talk to a guy drunk, especially if I have class with him the next day
Who do you have class with??
The guy that pulled down his pants in the middle of the dance floor to show me his tattoo
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
Look, road flare archery was agreed on. We both accepted it was a shit idea sober, but did it drunk anyway.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
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