i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Randomize
