Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
but there's so much I wanna do before I have kids. like die
is that a dick in a sweater?
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
That was the first time i’ve been physically intimidated by a LinkedIn profile.
Randomize
