Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
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