i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
The only thing worse than cracking my rib on a slip and slide was having the doctors laugh when they found out in my medical history that I did this exact same thing last summer.
He used his one phone call to tell me not to let anyone drink all his vodka until he could bail himself out.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
she asked me to come back to her house where "hopefully her kids were asleep". that my friend is what i call a dealbreaker
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
My orgasm happened in two different decades
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