that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Tried to bribe the bartender with wedding cake. Felt bad for not giving her a tip.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Slutty summer 2013 has officially started. I did accidentally bite a dick though.
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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