idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
No, "because my penis told me to" is not an acceptable answer to that question
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
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