I am dying of drunk and no thats not a typo.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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