So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
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