Betty ford says i'm here all night
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Randomize
