There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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