Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Watching her eat just hurts me
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
also I can check "jump into a moving car" off my bucket list if that tells you how tonight is going
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
Turns out, the guy I'm casually fucking has a girlfriend who's cheating on him with my sister's boyfriends brother who I fucked last year. And my sex life has now come full circle.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
