smell my finger.
you need to not memorize your credit card number for drunk pizza
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
