Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
Randomize
