who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Um. Did you take a picture of me with a giant dildo after we went bowling?
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
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