Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
So I got hit on by a gay guy. It might have something to do with the fact that I licked his nose.
And why did you do that?
Tequila
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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