ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Just jerked off to Cameron Diaz in "My Sister's Keeper". New low.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
she woke me up with a blowjob, mickey mouse pancakes, a mugshot of my ex in county jail, and tequilla. Do you know if she fucked someone behind my back or did i win the vagina lottery?
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
