Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
I just wanna get drunk and go sledding in my kayak
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
Randomize
