I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
17 year olds will be the death of me.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
I need to sanitize my soul.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
Randomize