This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Randomize
