isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
I think it might be brain cancer. Hangovers can't be this bad
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
Randomize
