i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
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