Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
saying, "have a good fall!" After fucking a virgin boy is good etiquette, right?
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
