That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
