escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
You tend to look at life differently when you wake up to nutella vomit all over your room with no recollection of how it got there
You know how to spell recollection?
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
