So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
