i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I don't think its a good idea if I moon a whole bar again
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
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