just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
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i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Hey we need to step our game up. Dad has us beat; he stole a vending machine once.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
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Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize