I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
No, but I woke up here and my pockets are full of raisins. Like 6 different pockets.
I apparently started to text you last night. All it said was 'the whole clam'. I hope that means something to you.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
