why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
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