so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Meh. I'll learn enough German to ask her for a handjob, then I'm out
You never cease to amaze me.
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
I need to go home for the safety of everyone in a 10 mile radius, especially me
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
Randomize