I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
She kept giving the uber driving directions and we all thought they were wrong so we'd send him the other way. Turns out she wasn't guiding us home, but to the half gallon that she hid in the bushes on the way to the bar.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
Randomize
