Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I want you more than I want a burrito.
I'm not as filling.
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
