Alarm just got pulled in my exam
Swear it wasn't me
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
He showed me his sex playlist and it looked good, so I slept with him.
Randomize
