Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
you guys were way drunker than both of me
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
That reminds me of that one time you handcuffed me to a table leg while I was reaching for the vodka.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Dude this weed smells so good they should make it into a Vicks vapor rub scent and I would rub it all over myself.
one of these days i'm gonna do a sparkly magical girl transformation into snoop dogg
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
Staff meetings will be awkward since my boss and I both did the new intern
Maybe she doesn’t know you did him
Oh she definitely knows - it was a threesome
Please tell me you’re not taking life advice from porn scripts again
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