Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
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