umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
My roommate has gone Christmas crazy. It looks like Jack Frost came all over my living room. Wanna come fuck me in the fake snow by the fireplace?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
I have the most nasty and explicit wet dreams of my boss that I'm embarrassed to look him in the face. I'd be pregnant or promoted if he only knew
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
so third time im replacing the batteries on my vibrator in 2 months #sosingle....on another note though, black beauty is raring to go
YOU FUCKED THE DARE INSTRUCTOR DIDN'T YOU?
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