i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Randomize
