Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
let your parents know i'm sorry i ran around the house pretending their metal detector was a "booze detector"
Randomize
