R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Hello my rib-scented angel!
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
I almost accidentally threw him out a window during sex last night.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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