I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
I swear he shrunk like 2 inches. Remind me that drunk sex needs to remain drunk sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just realized I'm marrying a man that's never gone down on me. What happened to my priorities?
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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