Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I wish I could donate my sober boners to my whiskey dick
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize
