a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
I booked us a cruise for November. Lose 20 pounds and don't cheat on me before then.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
Nah, he's definitely here somewhere. Whether he survived the night or not is your problem, but I'm pretty sure he's around.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
Randomize
