Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
